


(Or This Could Be) The Beginning of the End

by deathishauntedbyhumans



Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: Angst, Emotional Constipation, F/M, Multi, One-Sided Attraction, Pining, Relationship(s), Spoilers for s4e3 and s4e4, Wordcount: 100-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 14:27:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18153050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathishauntedbyhumans/pseuds/deathishauntedbyhumans
Summary: Facing monsters and villains is so much easier than facing your own emotional baggage. Star deals with knowing that Tom knows she and Marco kissed, and Marco tries to help, even though he... doesn’t really know what help means, anymore.





	(Or This Could Be) The Beginning of the End

**Author's Note:**

> Title stolen from the song _Things I Want_ from the musical _Lizard Boy_. 
> 
> Teenagers are dumb. 
> 
>  
> 
> ~~This fic is being posted/was written before s4e5 airs, and will probably be negated by the later eps of s4. I recognise this!! I just don’t care.~~

“You told Tom we kissed,” Star says flatly without precedence, and anything Marco had been about to say shoves itself out of his head. Panicked static replaces it; sure, he’s been expecting this,  but it still manages to catch him off guard.

“Look, Star—“

“How could you tell him?” Star asks, turning away from him to pace the floor of her bedroom agitatedly. “And why didn’t you tell me you told him? You’re my _squire,_ Marco. You’re my _best friend!!_ We weren’t supposed to talk about what happened!”

Marco crosses Star’s room to collapse on her bed, because frankly, he’s exhausted, and he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say, here. Star’s been so… different, lately. He doesn’t blame her, not with everything that’s happened with the monsters and Eclipsa and her mom, but… it doesn’t make it any easier to talk to her when she’s upset like this.

“I told him while we were fighting Meteora, because I was trying to make him angry enough to leave me and go protect you,” he says honestly, because Star hasn’t stopped pacing. “I know we weren’t supposed to talk about it, but I didn’t have a lot of options at the time, Star. You—“

“ _Aagh_!” Star makes a strangled sound, pulling at her own hair, so Marco stops talking and just watches her pace, back and forth and back and forth.

Thinking about that kiss does _things_ to Marco’s stomach. It’s not like _he_ wants to talk about it, either.

“He told his _mom,_ Marco!” Star turns on her heel, facing him from the opposite side of the room. “His _mom!”_

Marco frowns, confusion etched in his brow. “...and?”

“And!!” Star waves her hands dramatically. “He didn’t tell _me_! Until he _had to,_ Marco! And then he got mad at me for being mad at him for not talking to me because I didn’t talk to him!”

It takes Marco a good second to decipher that sentence, and while he’s busy processing, Star groans and crosses the room in a few long strides, flopping down onto the bed beside him. She shoves her face into her pillow and lets out a muffled, wordless scream into the depths of the fluff.

“So… you’re mad at Tom?” Marco asks slowly, and Star makes another unintelligible noise into the pillow. “Or… you’re mad at me?”

“I don’t know,” Star half-yells. She presses her face deeper into the pillow.

Marco reaches over to carefully pat her back, and when Star doesn’t shove him away or smack him, he rubs her upper back soothingly, just below the spot he knows her wings would be if she were to summon them.

Star lifts her face a few inches away from the pillow, although the rest of her stays right where it is on the bed. “I don’t know,” she repeats in a more subdued tone. She sounds… defeated. Marco _hates_ that tone. It’s the same way she’d sounded when Glossaryck had refused to take her hand after being stolen by Ludo, the same way she’d sounded when she’d thought Eclipsa had disappeared after receiving the wand. It’s the way she sounds whenever she’s completely lost, and Marco—

Marco’s the cause of it, this time, at least partially.

“I want to be mad at Tom for not telling me he knew, and I want to be mad at you for telling him,” she says softly. Marco’s hand stills on her back, but he doesn’t pull it away. “But… I keep thinking about it, and it— it’s my fault. I should have told Tom what happened. He’s _my_ boyfriend. And I shouldn’t have gotten upset when I found out he knew. He’s your friend, Marco, and you’re _my_ friend. Friends— Friends tell each other things.” She drops her face back into the pillow. Her, “I’m just so tired of being a _grown-up,”_ comes out muffled and frustrated.

“Star,” Marco begins gently. He feels her tense under his fingers and rubs his thumb gently along her spine without moving the rest of his hand. “It’s not your fault. I mean… yeah, part of it is, but part of it’s my fault, too. And Tom’s. We’re all keeping secrets from each other, and that’s… really bad. I’m— I’m sorry, Star. For my part.”

Star groans softly, then lifts her head again, propping her chin against the pillow. “Thanks, Marco.” She still sounds dejected, but her voice isn’t as hollow as it was before. “I just… don’t know what I’m going to do. I need— I need to talk to Tom about it. We didn’t— really get a chance to.” There’s something in the way she hesitates, the guilt in the shift of her voice, that suggests that something _important_ happened, but Marco is too tired to pry. “But I don’t know how! _How_ do I talk to my boyfriend about the fact that I kissed my best friend!?”

Marco winces a little and does his best not to think to hard about that sentence. “I don’t know if there’s a right way to do it,” he admits. “I think you just… gotta go for it.”

“...right.” Star drops her head down once more, and this time, Marco gets the impression that she has no intention of moving. “Tomorrow,” she mumbles. “I’ll deal with it tomorrow.”

It’s a cue to leave if Marco’s ever heard one, so he finally takes his hand back and stands up, rubbing the back of his head. “You can always talk to me, if you want to,” he offers lightly. “And… I’ll make sure I talk to you.”

Star’s answering hum is half-swallowed by her pillow. “G’night, Marco.”

Marco lifts one hand in a wave he knows she can’t see before slipping out of the room. “G’night, Star,” he replies softly, and shuts her door before he gives himself a chance to say something stupid like _I love you_ and make everything that much worse. 

**Author's Note:**

> Teenagers are SO dumb. 
> 
> I just want Tom to be happy. I also would love for Marco to be happy. And... y’know, Star. Can’t they all just??? be happy??? Hnngh. 
> 
> Kudos/comments are love! Come scream at me on tumblr @deathishauntedbyhumans


End file.
